I just finished making a baby quilt for one of his teachers. Coach and Mrs. Grayson have been a favorite of Noah's and now John's (boy #2). It seems like just yesterday I was the one making plans for the new baby. I think back about all of the firsts...my favorite was the first ice cream headache. Call me a bad mommy, but it was very funny. No one ever tells you about that one. Occasionally, I think about the lasts, but they more often sneak past me without much notice. Lasts are caught years later when you can't remember the last time you did something...like the last time I read a good night story, or tucked them in bed and whispered "Thank you God for my boy" as he fell asleep.
I get freaked out because life seems to be changing. It moves faster than I am able to. I want to hold on to my boys hand for just a little while longer...like forever. That isn't how God made things. Everything is constantly growing or changing. Even mountains get worn down over the years. Little by little the wind and the rain change them. We just don't notice. I forget that God is in control, has been all along. My boy no longer needs me like he once did. He isn't supposed to, and I'm not supposed to help him in the same ways either.
I am ever grateful to an awesome God who has given me the pleasure, and head aches, of raising the fine young man I see before me. My Noah is a joy and a comfort to me, may he continue to be so to all he meets as he takes up his own journey.
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